Please stop emailing me everyday.  George Bush didn't email me.  In fact, I don't even think George Bush knew what "the email"  was.  I mean, it's cool that you put my name in the subject line, as if we're old friends, and you're just dropping me a quick hello... but I don't want to donate $5 to Organizing for America.  Last time I did that I got put on this really annoying mailing list, which I can't seem to unsubscribe from.  I mean, you did send me that cool t-shirt... but it was XXL, and navy blue really isn't my color... so yeah...
Anyway, please lay off the mass emails, but feel free to shoot me a text when I can finally start going to a real hospital when I'm sick.  WebMD always tells me I have tuberculosis, but I quit my job at the mill, so that can't be right.
Love,
Courtney